The Search for Contentment

25 Feb

Hello lovelies,

This has been a wonderful week for me. I had to opportunity to volunteer for In Performance at the White House, and yes, I worked at the White House. I didn’t, however, get to see the president. I will not give all the details here, but I will in a later post. Stay tuned!

Today I want to introduce the wonderful Dr. Natural Hair. She will answer all your natural hair questions as best as she can. I met her through Facebook, she saw my blog and was interested in contributing. She is a certified natural hair stylist and has been giving advice on natural and loc hair maintenance for several years. Here is the interview I had with her last week.


Afro: Dr. Natural it is a pleasure to have this meeting today. I would like to jump right into it and ask why natural hair.

Dr. Natural: Why natural? Why not natural is the question you should be asking. Natural hair is lovely and black woman around the world are starting to catch on. Honestly I feel it is absurd that we have this struggle with our hair. Not saying that we as woman are crazy, but it’s just hair.

Afro: So you think  hair is not important?

Dr. Natural: No, I don’t think the way you wear your hair should cause all the negativity that comes. The negativity I’m speaking of is the self-conflict concerning hair and the negative comments from relatives and friends. There should not be heated arguments about natural hair versus permed hair. Or at least that discussion should not make your blood pressure rise, but it does.

Afro: What do you think can be done to change people’s concept of natural hair?

Dr. Natural: Absolutely nothing. People’s concepts will not change unless they are ready to have a different perception. The only thing you and I can do is to be comfortable with who you are. If you decide to go natural be comfortable with yourself. If you want to keep a perm be comfortable with that. Now let me explain what I mean by comfortable. If you wake up most days and are content with your hair, then you are comfortable. There are some exceptions like if you just started to be natural, you may find it hard to get use to your hair, because you just started you won’t be comfortable. But on the other hand if has been a few years and you feel miserable about your hair for reasons unrelated to your self-esteem then do what is best for you.

Afro: Do you think natural hair is for everybody.

Dr. Natural: Of course. That question is ridiculous, that’s like asking are two eyes for everybody, is having fingers for everybody, is having nails for everybody it grows out of your scalp so why would it not be right for you?

Afro: What about the people who have a hard time doing their hair?

Dr. Natural: That’s just an excuse to get a perm. The truth is if you really want your hair natural, you will take the time needed to find a way to work with your hair. You must find what works best for you, find the products, the best hairstyles, find a routine, find the money. When you really want to do something, you make it happened, not dish out excuses of why it can’t be done.

Afro: Wow, I never looked at it that way. I always felt that woman should do what they want with their hair.

Dr. Natural: Well that goes back to our previous discussion, you have to do what you feel comfortable with, but to say that you don’t know how to do it. Maybe it is because I’m a hairstylist, but honestly as I have already said, if natural is what you really want to do, then you will find a way.

Afro: If there’s a will there’s a way.

Dr. Natural: Exactly. You may be surprise but as you see I have locs and yours a nice by the way.

Afro: Thank you. Yours are gorgeous as well.

Dr. Natural: Thanks! But when  woman comes to me telling me she wants locs, but is not sure yeah, you may be surprise, but I do not encourage them to go for it. First they ask me if they have to get all their hair cut off, and then they ask me how long does it take to loc. Then, they of through this story of how they are debating. Look, if you want locs, then just do it and stop over analyzing. You can grow out your perm, it’s just healthier to cut it off, it takes a different amount of time for everyone, and if you can’t decide then just wear some braids for a while and stop bugging me about it. That’s not my problem. When you are ready make sure you are ready. No one is putting a gun to your head telling you to loc your hair. The growth of this country is not depending on you to make a decision now. Take your time, despite what you think, you do have control over what you do to you hair.

Afro: I understand that you have control, but what about the nay sayers?

Dr. Natural: What about the nay sayers?

Afro: Well let’s put it this way, what about the family and friends that…

Dr. Natural: I’m going to cut you off right there. People are going to dash out their opinions all day, but you are the one that’s going to have to get out of bed every morning and look at yourself in the mirror, not them, except if that’s your husband and if you husband is so against it, I don’t know what to say because I’m not a relationship counselor, but all I can say is it doesn’t matter what people say because guess what, people have this amazing ability to adapt and after a while they will get use to your decision. Eventually they will start liking your look and wanting it for themselves. I am aware that there are extreme cases, where a person can’t get over it, but that says more about who they are, so you just might have to adapt to there attitude and get use to it in order to have your freedom. What is more important their approval or you begin comfortable with yourself.

Afro: I see you looking at your watch and I realize we are running out of time, do you have any last words you want to say.

Dr. Natural: I just want to thank you for bringing me on here and letting me share my advice. If there is one thing that I want to stick to your mind it is this, stop making your hair such a big deal. I know that is not easy for some us, but better put, stop worrying about what other woman are doing with their hair, if you are natural it’s cool, if you have a perm that’s fine too, but we have to stop trying to tell people what to do with their hair. I’m not saying that is what you do, I’m just saying in general, just focus on your self, you waste too much energy trying to convince someone to agree with you or do what you think is best for them.

Afro: Well I appreciate your time and I look forward to your tips on hair care.

Dr. Natural: Thanks for having me and I will be back next week with the Tuesday Tip of the week.

Afro: I can’t wait. Again thank you so much.



One Response to “The Search for Contentment”

  1. jayspence March 7, 2011 at 5:41 PM #

    This is a wonderful interview you have posted, and I think more black women need to have access to it. Your interview with this natural hairstylist gives such positive outlooks on why more black women should accept and embrace their natural hair, and if they commit to it, should wear and represent the style beautifully. I wore my hair natural for about six or seven years and it was the healthiest it ever was. I have thick yet fine hair so I’d say it was a little bit easier more me to maintain than those with very coarse textured hair, but it still took effort to maintain. Unfortunately, when I got to college I had to again start perming it because it’s hard to keep it healthy with my training schedule. I do eventually plan to go back to natural one day, when I have have to time to manage it again.

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